Lists of things you should “never say” to this or that group of people are a plague on the Interwebz.
For one thing, they are typically arrogant assertions of privilege and entitled elevation above normal human interaction. Moreover, they’re often premised on a subtext of denigration and grievance against the class of people presumed to be saying the things in question. Often, the “things to never say” are strawman arguments, gross exaggerations, or distorted misquotes intended to slander a certain kind of person as unsavory, vulgar, or deserving of disdain.
How dare one of you say such a thing to one of us? Yeah, go f*ck yourself.
So, when I recently saw a list of things to never say to authors, I thought maybe I should comment on it since I’m in the elevated in-group rather than the denigrated out-group. Continue reading