I watched Warcraft this past weekend. Throughout the first half of the film, I was confused. The story wasn’t boring, but it was somehow unsatisfying. The characters were well-defined, but were not engaging. The dialogue wasn’t bad, but it kept falling flat.
What the hell was going on?
With Valentine’s Day close approaching, most of you are thinking of two: yourself and that special someone.
But, Golden Girls fans might be thinking of three, due to one of the most quotable quotes of the series, from an episode called “Valentine’s Day.”
In a pharmacy, the three youngest Girls are preparing for a romantic weekend with three men. Blanche hints that they should take “protection” with them. After Rose guesses incorrectly what Blanche means (three times!) Dorothy blurts out:
Condoms, Rose! Condoms, condoms, condoms!
That thrice repeated emphasis is an example of what the Romans called omne trium perfectum, meaning “every three is perfect.” We see this pattern both in literature and the visual arts. In photography and painting, it is often called the Rule of Thirds. You can actually see this in the Golden Girls gif at right, wherein Dorothy is the middle third of the image.
In writing, it is called the Rule of Three. But, although all threes may be perfect, not all threes are the same. For the benefit of my readers who are also writers, I want to discuss the various forms of the Rule of Three and, in honor of season three of Black Sails, I’ll include a few examples from that popular and well-written series.
This is going to be one part writing advice, one part literary theory, and several parts fan fiction to show how it all works.
Back in 2011, I had been thinking a lot about what goes into crafting a good story. Particularly, I had been struck by how awful the 1978 film adaptation of Chandler‘s The Big Sleep
Also, while reading Bukowski‘s Pulp
I have been pinged1 a few times lately by fans who are a little miffed2 that I rescinded publication of The Ligan of the Disomus so I could finish the book that precedes it in the Observer’s Casebook series. Why is the first book taking so long? Part of the explanation is that I’ve been working on other projects, including the 2nd edition of On The Head Of A Pin
But, the core reason is that The Crow and the Kinnebeck is a nested tale, otherwise known as a frame story or “story within a story.” A writer has to be extra careful spinning this sort of yarn. Let me describe the dynamics of the frame story, then offer a Top Five list of pointers for writers ambitious enough to attempt a complex nested narrative.
The difficult thing about creating a fictional alien species is that if they are too familiar, they seem inauthentic. Slap some bumps on the forehead and voilà : every Star Trek alien ever. And, the Star Trek franchise eventually had to explain this phenotypical homogeneity (ask a fan, but it’s in a Next Generation episode) to keep the credibility of the milieu intact.
On the other hand, to seem scientifically authentic aliens have to be … unfamiliar? Unrelatable? What’s a better word?
Alien.
However, if you take the creative process step-by-step, you can work outward from simple premises to alien species that are both inhuman yet believable and understandable. Continue reading
It’s time for another installment of my series on avoiding words and phrases that derive from a technology that’s not present in the story you’re writing.
Have you ever been captivated by a story set in a Medieval world when suddenly someone lets fly with a scene-stopping anachronism like, “Let’s go to the tavern and blow off some steam”? You don’t have to be Sheldon Cooper to recognize “blowing off steam” as a railroad term that is way out of place. A writer who goes off the rails like that, sabotaging his story and letting his readers get sidetracked by his literary tunnel vision, will never make the grade.
Well, actually, maybe he will… but wouldn’t you like to avoid faux pas like that in your storytelling adventures? Let’s say you’re writing a tale in a world that never knew a tamed bird of prey. Let me show you some words and phrases that you may not realize owe their origin to the kingly sport of falconry. Continue reading
In the intro cinematic for the popular Medieval fantasy video game, Skyrim, the player finds herself in a wagon full of prisoners being hauled to a fort for punishment. When the wagon arrives, one of the prisoners mutters that it’s “the end of the line.”
Did a nasty squealing-to-a-halt sound just rip through your mind? Then you must know that “end of the line” is railroad terminology. The phrase has no place in a pre-industrial setting like Skyrim.
Historical fiction and fantasy occasionally stumble over technologically misplaced language that can knock informed readers out of the story. (Or informed viewers … check out this piece on the timeliness of fonts in the TV series “Mad Men.”) If you want to avoid jarring and alienating your smartest fans, it can help to know the technological origins of some of English’s common words and phrases.
In this new series, I’ll introduce you to some terms you might not know originated in a specific technology. If the tech’s not part of your setting, you can detour around the terminology. On the other hand, if it is part of your setting, you can find interesting ways to use the jargon!
And, although the series is called “Timely Terms,” it’s not merely about anachronism; if your setting is a desert world with no oceans (and therefore no sailing) you might want to avoid language derived from the Age of Sail. But, let’s get started with the first topic, suggested by Skyrim: the railroad. Continue reading
Of course, the big news in the literary world is the passing of Anne McCaffrey. The best tribute (I have read) to this amazing author is by Juliette Wade, who discusses how McCaffrey brought genre definitions into play with her Dragonriders of Pern series. Also at Wade’s Talk To YoUniverse blog: an excellent piece on how hard choices for your characters require consequences.
Melville House, one of my favorite sources for publishing news, details an intense and disappointing exchange between blogger Jeremy Duns, who outed the plagiarism of Quentin Rowan, and the latest accused plagiarist Lenore Hart. (By the way, considering that her subject is Poe, Lenore Hart must be a pseudonym, yes?)
BEST READ OF THE DAY: Josh Getzler at Hey There’s a Dead Guy gives us a truly remarkable insight into the writing process by showing us how a writer feels when he’s given the opportunity to enjoy his own writing as a reader. There is so much that can be taken from this piece (for writers and readers) that I won’t say more. Go check it out.
After my brief detour through Charles Bukowski‘s Pulp
In science news, Jupiter’s moon Europa is believed to have shallow subsurface lakes that connect to the deeper moon-wide ocean. Hard sci-fi writers … On your mark! Get set!
On the writing front: Continue reading
In honor of my friend Ron Gullekson‘s blog post, “Ten Rumors I’d Like To Start,” let me offer my bookish version: Continue reading
